Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Doh! A Deer

So, once again I have long been absent from the blogging world.  What can I say, I'm a busy person!  We have had several events that deserve blogging - a couple of birthdays, a pair of shoes made from a bageldog wrapper and duct tape, 3 first days of school, Lotoja, and so on and so forth.  I do have hopes of one day organizing my photos and attempting a catch up blog of the highlights, but I wouldn't advise holding your breath.  Maybe it will happen, maybe it won't.  Just to try to get back into the swing of things here, I'm going to start with the tale of the deer.  Sorry - it's a long one.  (Reader discretion is advised if you are overly squeamish, but I don't think I will include any photos, although Shawn did take some with his cell phone that if you would really like to see, he would be happy to show you.)

On an evening a couple of weeks ago, as we are prone to do occasionally, we went boating up at Echo.  This being a school night, we were making a great effort to get off the water and home at a somewhat reasonable hour (something that previously, we have not done well.)  All things considered, we did pretty well, but it was still dark by the time we were on the road with the boat.  Now keep in mind that this is a suburban, pulling a boat, so a rather large object that has no chance of braking and stopping on a whim.  Anyway, we are driving along and from the side of the road, out jumps a buck.  Shawn exhibited his great driving prowess and managed to brake and swerve enough to avoid the deer.  Just as we were settling into the feeling of relief of having avoided tragedy, I look out my window and realize that the deer wasn't alone, so I say "Oh no, there's another one." (Profound, I know, but there wasn't time for much else.)  Shawn and I brace ourselves, and sure enough there is a thump, and he says, "I got it." 

 At this point the kids are aware something has happened but they don't really know what and we are trying to keep it that way.  I look back to see if I can see the deer or any obvious damage, but it's too dark.  Then, I glance in the side view mirror and I can see deer legs!  All I can say is, "Oh, oh , oh, it's on the trailer!  Eeeww, eeewww!"  I'm trying to keep this quiet but the kids are definitely curious and concerned as to what is going on.  

By this time we are now in the town of Coalville and Shawn pulls over across the street from the Polar King.  We don't quite know what to do - we don't want the kids to turn around and look because we don't really know what, um, state everything is in - whether all parts are attached etc.  Finally Shawn gets out to take a look and I follow.  Fortunately, (I guess) the deer is all in one piece but definitely dead, definitely stuck on the trailer under the boat and definitely large.  No clear signs of serious damage to the boat that we could see- in the dark at least- just a bit messy if you catch my drift.  But we still have a problem.  We are very clearly city-folk and not of the hunting persuasion and have no idea how to get the deer out or what to do with it if and when we do.  So we call the sheriff.  In a small town like Coalville, you'd expect the sheriff to be able to show up within 5 minutes or so, but after 45 minutes of waiting, we decided we were going to need to find help somewhere else.  By this time all the kids are so tired and cranky - it was well past their bedtimes, and I was freezing and we still had this dumb deer to deal with.  (We did briefly entertain thoughts of just parking the boat and leaving it for our co-owners to discover, but tying on the cover would have been rather problematic and disgusting.)  We could, however, occasionally see the humor in the whole situation and despite the sadness over the death of the poor doe, did manage (and still do manage) to laugh at the improbability of the whole thing.  Finally, Shawn went and asked some fine gentlemen (line painters who had been dining at the Polar King as we waited in vain for the sheriff to come) for a little help.  They found him some rubber gloves since Samantha had been continuously yelling from the car, "Dad - you are never, never supposed to touch a dead animal!!  (And really, who could argue with her on that point?)  

When they walked around to the back of the car, one of them said, "Smells like deer."  (Those were the only words he uttered.)  It was all Shawn could do to keep from cracking up right then.  They probably do a little more hunting and such than we ever have.  But thankfully, they just grabbed on to the poor deer and yanked her out of there so Shawn didn't have to have the oogie feeling of touching a dead, but still warm animal.  Of course all we could do was leave it on the side of the road.  We felt really bad because it was in front of someone's house.  We did call the sheriff again and let them know that it was there.  (Apparently, they were busy that night.)  But as of 2 days later when our friends went up, it was still there.  So our sincerest apologies to the family living across from the Polar King and to the doe whose life we took and to the buck whom we unintentionally left all alone in the world.  (At least we spared him though.)  Tying up the boat was gross, and we didn't get home until 10:15, but we have a unique story to tell and we can still say that we have never been in a car that has hit a deer.