Can I Opt Out, Please?

So, we've spent the last several days with me and 4 of 5 kids having the stomach flu. Lots of fun. At least we tried to be efficient with 3 of us coming down with it within 10 hours. Somehow I was remembering the forms that they sent home from my kids schools to allow you to opt out of listening to Obama's school speech. I started thinking that I wished they had a few of those for parenting also. I would gladly opt out of any illness that involves the spewing forth of bodily fluids. (Snot, I can deal with when I have to. Not pleasant, but there are worse things-like the afore mentioned.) I thought I would also opt out of potty training because there's not any of that that's fun. I decided I would keep a bit of the whining and complaining and stuff because, otherwise, how would I know to appreciate everyone being happy and pleasant. I'm sure that in the long run it's all good for me somehow, and I know I signed up for it the second I decided to become a parent, but still, it was a nice thought while I had it.